The Necessity of "Faking It Until You Make It"

When we're caught in fear, sometimes "faking it until you make it" is the only way forward.

We won’t always be overflowing with feelings of radical love and unconditional self acceptance. These things do not happen overnight, much as we might want to will them into existence.
Rather than shaming ourselves for our experience and for not “being further” when we get caught up in fear and negativity, we could experiment with asking questions like
“How would someone who feels worthy talk to themselves?”
“If I really loved my body, what would I eat? How would I move through space?”

We cannot force ourselves to feel something that we don’t, but we CAN practice forming new patterns and new ways of existing in our mind and body. The more we do this, the more it will become second nature, until one day we might even find that it’s become our reality.

Elaboration

Swimming in the river has been a daily respite for me.

A few days ago I posted a photo on social media with the caption “Life is an evolution, not a race. You’re exactly where you need to be here and now”. Recently it felt right to repost it with an updated message. Not that I don’t firmly believe that life is not a race, and that we’re all exactly where we need to be, but there are a lot of vague inspirational one-liners and quotes in the online spiritual new age world that can feel unrelatable. The elaboration is that you can know that you’re where you need to be and that everything is unfolding the way it needs to while also experiencing loss and overwhelm. 
Life has felt relentless for me these past six weeks- between a breakup, the death of a family member, chronic pain management, needing to move across the country 6 weeks earlier than expected, finding housing, and a few others. 
Not fighting your life experience creates more peace, but being on the right path doesn’t mean that there are never any more difficult days. There is a limbo period when you’ve decided to bravely up and leave a life that is no longer for you but you’re not yet in your new one that can be really f**king lonely (Martha Beck refers to the experience as the empty elevator syndrome, for anyone who’s interested and wants further information). 
All of the feelings can (and probably will) surface- depression, fear, doubt, extreme resistance. It might be excruciating for a while, but it is so much easier and worthwhile in the long run to follow what feels right rather than to force yourself into a life that no longer fits.